diff --git a/TODO.md b/TODO.md
index 9c65997b..e9725698 100644
--- a/TODO.md
+++ b/TODO.md
@@ -20,7 +20,7 @@
 - verify that uiParentSetMainControl() does indeed not update
 - settle differences between intmax_t and uintmax_t
 - settle onDestroy/destroy naming
-- clean up Unix lifetiming code
+- clean up Windows lifetiming code
 
 ultimately:
 - make everything vtable-based
diff --git a/unix/newcontrol.c b/unix/newcontrol.c
index 1a9006f8..d7a39d5c 100644
--- a/unix/newcontrol.c
+++ b/unix/newcontrol.c
@@ -25,8 +25,10 @@ static void singleDestroy(uiControl *c)
 	(*(s->onDestroy))(s->onDestroyData);
 	// then mark that we are ready to be destroyed
 	g_signal_handler_disconnect(s->immediate, s->destroyBlocker);
-	// then actually destroy
+	// then actually destroy (TODO sync these comments)
 	gtk_widget_destroy(s->immediate);
+	// and free ourselves
+	uiFree(s);
 }
 
 static uintptr_t singleHandle(uiControl *c)
diff --git a/unix/parent.c b/unix/parent.c
index a279c814..9e934484 100644
--- a/unix/parent.c
+++ b/unix/parent.c
@@ -46,6 +46,8 @@ static void uipParent_dispose(GObject *obj)
 	if (!p->canDestroy)
 		complain("attempt to dispose uiParent with uipParent at %p before uiParentDestroy()", p);
 	if (p->children != NULL) {
+		if (p->children->len != 0)
+			complain("disposing uiParent with uipParent at %p while there are still children", p);
 		g_ptr_array_unref(p->children);
 		p->children = NULL;
 	}
@@ -150,6 +152,8 @@ static void parentDestroy(uiParent *pp)
 	p->canDestroy = TRUE;
 	// finally, destroy the parent
 	gtk_widget_destroy(GTK_WIDGET(p));
+	// and free ourselves
+	uiFree(pp);
 }
 
 static uintptr_t parentHandle(uiParent *p)
diff --git a/unix/window.c b/unix/window.c
index a64cd189..a49c6b82 100644
--- a/unix/window.c
+++ b/unix/window.c
@@ -10,7 +10,7 @@ struct window {
 	int (*onClosing)(uiWindow *, void *);
 	void *onClosingData;
 	int margined;
-	gboolean canDestroy;
+	gulong destroyBlocker;
 };
 
 static gboolean onClosing(GtkWidget *win, GdkEvent *e, gpointer data)
@@ -28,13 +28,9 @@ static int defaultOnClosing(uiWindow *w, void *data)
 	return 1;
 }
 
-static void onDestroy(GtkWidget *widget, gpointer data)
+static void destroyBlocker(GtkWidget *widget, gpointer data)
 {
-	struct window *w = (struct window *) data;
-
-	if (!w->canDestroy)
-		complain("attempt to dispose uiWindow at %p before uiWindowDestroy()", w);
-	uiFree(w);
+	complain("attempt to dispose uiWindow at %p before uiWindowDestroy()", data);
 }
 
 // TODO should we change the GtkWindow's child first?
@@ -47,9 +43,11 @@ static void windowDestroy(uiWindow *ww)
 	// next, destroy the content uiParent
 	uiParentDestroy(w->content);
 	// now that we cleaned up properly, we can mark our window as ready to be destroyed
-	w->canDestroy = TRUE;
+	g_signal_handler_disconnect(w->widget, w->destroyBlocker);
 	// finally, destroy the window
 	gtk_widget_destroy(w->widget);
+	// and free ourselves
+	uiFree(w);
 }
 
 static uintptr_t windowHandle(uiWindow *ww)
@@ -136,7 +134,7 @@ uiWindow *uiNewWindow(const char *title, int width, int height)
 	gtk_window_resize(w->window, width, height);
 
 	g_signal_connect(w->widget, "delete-event", G_CALLBACK(onClosing), w);
-	g_signal_connect(w->widget, "destroy", G_CALLBACK(onDestroy), w);
+	w->destroyBlocker = g_signal_connect(w->widget, "destroy", G_CALLBACK(destroyBlocker), w);
 
 	w->content = uiNewParent((uintptr_t) (w->container));
 	w->onClosing = defaultOnClosing;